From now until April 8th (Easter), I will refrain from using vibrators on my body. I try to make some kind of lifestyle change each year for Lent*, and this year I've decided that my time spent with vibrators is often less than ideal.
Sometimes I just want to get off. I'll feel a little frustrated and I'll really just want to get on with life and do something else, but I'm horny so I'll get off and be done with it. After some consideration, I don't like the way I handle my sexual arousal sometimes. My arousal and desire to feel release is just a part of who I am. It's an urge; a need that I try to meet.
When I come with a vibrator without much self-appreciation, it feels like the equivalent of wolfing down a meal replacement bar when I'm hungry.** There's a need and a meet it in a fix-it-and-forget-it fashion. The orgasm itself feels good, sure, but the experience is often hurried and feels like a chore. I'd like to spend more time enjoying myself and learning about my body instead of just placating my desires with a quick fix.
I try not to worry about whether this practice is damaging my libido as a whole, but honestly that's part of why I'm making this change.
So here's to forty days and forty nights without vibrators. Fingers, dildos, dicks, and orgasms are all still welcome.
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*I'm an atheist who enjoys participating in certain religious rituals. I just like discipline trials, really.
**I avoid meal replacement bars. They usually disgust me.
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